Mission: Happiness

Look at me I'm only 18
I've suffered from more shit then I could scrape to be clean.
Been unhappy so long my regular face looks mean,
Wow tragedy no that shit is obscene

I've witness death, been dead but I didnt stay on the other side,
Saw the light, ran from it, man it aint easy to hide.
It wasn't my turn so i had to get back in line for the ride,
All this because of some bullshit called pride.

Pride something that kept me down through time,
Forced my days before 18 to those of crime.
Had my mans switch sides on me at the drop of a dime,
That why I roll solo Chillin on the pride tree that I climb.

Tooo damn ignorant to let love know its welcome here,
Too damn blind to know that it was too damn near.
Tried to be something Im not for too many years,
And now I'm the one crying invisible tears.

Childhood mistakened me and passed by me,
Father was around the corner but couldnt come by you see,
His pride got him and he had to fly wildly
Got his panties in a bunch and frowns instead of smiling near me.

Its fucked up but it adds to the clout on my shoulder,
Keepin it all in as I grow older.
Dumbass me, shouldve known i had to get over,
Over his faults, instead of trying to be an unwounded soldier.

So much has happened so how do i get to happiness?
More memories in my mind that make me reminise.
Be careful what you ask for... I never asked for this,
So how can I be carefull for things that aren't on my list?

So much to do and so little time has become a theme song,
I've been saying this for too long so why do I continue to do wrong?
Trying to create time to get where I belong,
But damn this Pride of mine is getting too strong.

So imma slow down and wait a little while,
Find ways to drop my pride to become versatile.
Change my ways and upgrade my lifestyle,
So I can stop being angry and hostile.

Let freedom ring with my pen,
Create a rhythm with my mind again and again.
Enjoy life and its pleasures until the end,
Damn... why did it take so long to begin