Bullied By Life

Psychologically and physically,

Two ways of fear that were pushed on me,

Looking to retreat from real life but I’m to corrupted mentally,

To the world I’m a young time bomb waiting to explode,

Open with a select few, but to others I seem closed,

In, like there’s no way for me to escape,

To worried about whose real and whose fake,

Trapped in a time where all I want to do is abrogate,

Everything in my sight except my dreams and my fate,

Meaning I can see my future or at least I’m making a description,

In my mind so I stay sane to keep away from that prescription,

That forces me to abdicate any of my good manners,

But I display it like vexiology and I show them like a banner,

Then I’m reminded that I will be refused because of my skin,

Damn life bullied me again into thinking racism was a kin,

Well a friend, but it was in some way,

Since it was cool with hate, hanged with fate and made a visit everyday,

Forced me to show no mercy at times, and to think with a selfish emotion,

Forget my love for many moments and to stray away from devotion,

Lose faith in things I was hoping would one day be something I could choose,

Life gave away some of those I loved to death like an old pair of shoes,

So in exchange Life kept me down, leaving my regular face as a frown,

Too afraid to look up so I tell my smile to look around,

Well mostly at the floor since I really wasn’t sure,

If I grew feelings for another, would my reminisces grow more,

Since Life would often beat me up, and had me thinking I wasn’t good enough,

Life made me insecure with all my actions, so each breathe became tough,

Everyone’s minds are full of lust and many other sins,

Which grows fear into bringing children into the world, guess Life got me again,

Since the children of the future are taught the stories of someone else’s four fathers,

And to some of them the role of a dad won’t be played so no one bothers,

To step into that child’s life and teach them foundation or understanding,

Just hold fault to their lack of guidance, and label them and begin commanding,

That they change their ways from that of what’s displayed,

Which forces them to frown upon change, and takes longer for them to be saved,

So I pose to the future a sacrifice, of my time, energy, and life,

Give up the hopeless dreams of finding a wife,

To become educated and instill upon them what wasn’t free,

Meaning I had to pay debt to a life to live that’s not for me,

Pay homage to those before me for giving me a small taste of something good,

So in return I step back into the hood, not just for a Wedding like in The Wood,

But to help my brothers and sister find value in themselves.

Regain the confidence that they hid away above their shelves,

Push back on society, and take more time just to pray,

Hold truth to everything I do especially what I say,

Since life has me bullied, I give it this message and before I press send,

I guess I will enjoy the climax of my story until my book reaches the end.